Physically worn out, Emotionally happy!

So, Sunday night, I received my first phone call from Eric.  We had a nice, long, chat.  It was wonderful to hear his voice.  We laughed about the mouse and about my fear and overcoming obstacles in the year and how I can be strong and I MUST rely on others to help me get through the next few weeks.....the next many, many, many weeks!!!!!!  I just want to be strong for the girls and for myself.  But, when I am sick..everyone suffers!!  I was happy to receive the pre-Valentine's Day call.  (on the day in his time zone)  So, I was on a high going into Valentine's Day.  But, of course, I woke up feeling TERRIBLE!  And, knowing that the day is what I make it--alone in the romance dept--but need to make good memories for my girls.  So, I tried to get in the mood.  I even made heart shaped dinner!

So, I got another phone call on Valentine's Day night.  It was so sweet but we had talked for 30 minutes the night before but I actually ran out of things to say about what was happening here...I asked questions regarding the email I received from him but for the life of me couldn't think of anything interesting to say happened here.  How does that happen?  I love to talk!  I love to tell him about my day!  But, the longer the deployment goes on, the less I have to say.  This happens every time.  I departmentalize my day and try to weed out the "junk" from the important stuff.  I start with important stuff and work my way down to total junk.  But, by the time I get to "junk" it seems like a waste of his time.  I think about how stupid the stuff must sound when he hears it and is sleeping in a shipping container (20' long) with another guy (and he is lucky because most are sleeping 3 to a "room").  So, it doesn't seem important to say, "I went to the PX and the lady was really rude."  I mean, really??  That's important?  NO!!!

And, the girls... Well D (8 y.o.) is doing better with this deployment than she did the last.  She was 6 during the last deployment and she didn't do too well.  She hasn't had a crying for daddy attack yet although she has a shorter fuse right now.  But, RJ (6 y.o.) is having a hard time.  The last time she was 4 and handled it like  a champ.  She didn't even cry when he left to return to Afghanistan from R/R.  So, what is the change?  What is it with the age?  Is it only girls this age?  Or boys too?  Does it depend on the moon phase and time of deployment?  Is there something I can do to change it?  RJ even came to my bedroom last night (I think last night) and said, "Mommy, is there such a thing as Daddy sickness because I miss him so much that my tummy hurts."  It breaks my heart.  So, what is an Army wife to do?  Act like a Mom while thinking like a Dad...or act like a Dad when needed and think like a Mom....  Who knows???  If you do....share your secrets!  (BTW, I do know those "tricks" in books, magazines, and online....)

Enjoy your night and hopefully tomorrow will be another sunny day and I can recover even more!